Spotlight On Sobriety 01/04/2026
- Dec 29, 2025
- 6 min read
Updated: Jan 4
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Doku-Doku Staying Sober in Tokyo
Message from the Chair
Roundup Calendar
Member Jan AA Anniversaries
Spotlight On Sobriety 01/04/2026
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Doku-Doku Staying Sober in Tokyo
Living in Tokyo taught me how to protect my sobriety. I liked being sober and joined the LGBT AA meetings there. I’d gotten sober on the Russian River in California in 1982, after being unemployed and sick and tired of being sick and tired. At my first-ever AA meeting in Santa Rosa, the speaker said, “You don’t have to drink if you don’t want to.” That sounded impossible, but I gave it a try—and my sobriety began the next day.
Two and a half years later, I finished a post-graduate certificate in teaching English as a Second Language and flew to Tokyo--unsure what life would hold. Japan turned out to be good for my career, but its drinking culture was rough. Like many countries, much of gay socializing took place in bars. Still, with a solid connection to Tokyo AA, a sponsor, and the Twelve Steps, I found my way and learned to enjoy recovery abroad.
One of my first surprises was seeing alcohol vending machines glowing along city sidewalks. On my late-night walk home from meetings at the Franciscan Center in Roppongi, they stood like sentinels, brighter than the streetlights, calling me to insert a few yen and press the button. I wasn’t used to alcohol being available like that. The machines frightened me at first, but I didn’t have to be a victim. I started calling them trolls and said to them, “Doku doku,” which means “poison poison” in Japanese. It made me laugh and reminded me to take my sobriety seriously. Even now, I still whisper “doku doku” when passing supermarket alcohol aisles—and still chuckle.
Japanese drinking culture was more subtle than beer machines at night. Men, especially, were expected to drink. At parties, I learned to decline politely and say alcohol made me sick. It’s a custom in Japan for people to pour drinks for each other, and some felt offended if I didn’t join in. A few businessmen told me I could just say, “Doctor stop,” meaning a doctor had forbidden me to drink. That simple phrase was usually accepted without question.
After several years, I spoke Japanese well enough to teach at corporations and later at a Tokyo university. One day, my department chair and I went to lunch. When I ordered iced barley tea, I overheard him whisper to the waitress, “Put a little sake in his drink too.” I was shocked—but grateful I understood enough Japanese to be warned. When my drink arrived, I sniffed it and caught the scent of sake. I quietly ordered water and left the spiked tea untouched. I had learned to test everything and to trust myself. Staying sober was more important than keeping everyone happy.
A few years later, the university president invited me to a banquet in my honor. He was seated at the head table beside me and, when he arrived, it was clear he had already been drinking. During dinner, he proposed a toast with sake. I raised my glass but didn’t drink. He noticed.
“Aren’t you going to drink?” he asked.
I thanked him and said I couldn’t drink alcohol. He laughed and said, “But this is Japanese water.”
I smiled and replied, “Japanese water is wonderful. I’m happy with mine.”
He pressed me again, saying he hadn’t seen me drink. I kept nodding, smiling, and holding my ground. Inside, I was terrified I might offend him and risk my job. But I also knew that if I drank to please him, I’d be the one to pay the price.
Finally, his secretary announced the president had another engagement, and he left the banquet early. I bowed deeply as he was escorted out and quietly thanked my Higher Power for watching over me.
Living sober in Japan wasn’t easy, but AA gave me the courage to take care of myself. The fellowship taught me that my recovery comes first—no matter where I am. The temptations, the cultural pressure, and the lonely nights all became lessons in spiritual strength.
When I think back on those years, I don’t remember the fear as much as the laughter—the laughter of saying “Doku doku” to glowing vending machines and realizing that I could face the world without a drink in my hand. I was, and still am, free.
Tom D.
Bear Creek, NC
Message from the Chair of GaL-AA
Happy New Year!
I am looking forward to starting our new year. We have six new members joining the Executive Committee. Anil P., our new Deputy Chair, and Chris B., our new Secretary along with Greg H. and Michael M. as advisors and Julie B. and Mark B. our new Liaisons. I love having new people on the committee.
They always come with new ideas.
Even though we might be tempted to rest on our laurels after our very successful programs at AA’s international Convention in Vancouver, we find that there is still much work to be done to carry our message of recovery and inclusion to all LGBTQ+ members and groups in Alcoholics Anonymous. To do this we have to strengthen our organization so that we can utilize the talents, experience, strength and hope of all our current members combined with the ideas of our new members.
With this in mind we are excited about adding a new level to GaL-AA’s organizational structure. We now have committees to concentrate on outreach, marketing, newsletter, policy and finance. They will be working on different projects that will help us reach out and increase our involvement in the LGBTQ+ recovering community. We already have volunteers who are working on these committees, but we are always looking for new folks to join. If you have interest and talents in the areas of Outreach, Newsletter, Marketing, Policy and Finance, reach out to us. We would love to hear from you. Each committee meets once a month.
The Executive Committee is required to meet face to face once a year. We have begun to choose where we want to hold this meeting during 2026. We would like for this meeting to serve as part of our overall outreach program, giving members of the LGBTQ+ community where it is held an opportunity to meet us in person and learn more about the things that GaL-AA does between International Conventions. We have a few suggestions that we have begun to look at.
With our new Outreach Committee starting this year, I am looking forward to going out into the community and interacting with many members (and recruiting new members). If your area is planning a LGBTQ+ friendly roundup and would like to have a GaL-AA presence please let us know. The Outreach Committee will be making plans to visit as many roundups as possible during all of 2026.
I hope everyone is starting out with a safe new year!
Hilde M.
MA
Roundup Calendar
GaL-AA Roundup Calendar & Listing Updated
Our Roundup Listing Has Been Updated!
We’ve added new Roundups to our Roundup Listing page, added some 2026 dates, all complete with links to each event. https://www.gal-aa.org/roundups
Check it out to find upcoming gatherings and opportunities for connection.
👉 Know of a Roundup we don’t have listed? Or see something that needs correcting?
Please send us the details so we can keep our list current and helpful for everyone. SpotlightOnSobriety@gal-aa.org
Member January 2026 AA Anniversaries
To add or edit your sobriety date, click on the link in the email you received from us. It is in the footer of the email where it says “update your preferences”. If you are not an email registered member yet, please click here to sign up.
Spotlight On Sobriety 01/04/2026
The Spotlight On Sobriety 01/04/2026 features personal stories, articles and reflections submitted by members and friends of the fellowship. The views expressed are those of the individual authors and do not necessarily represent those of Alcoholics Anonymous or GaL-AA.
Statement of Inclusion
GaL-AA exists to serve lesbians, gays, bisexuals, transgender people, queers and others in Alcoholics Anonymous regardless of how they self-identify. GaL-AA embraces all members of the AA Fellowship.
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