Spotlight On Sobriety 11/30/2025
- Steve N.
- 1 day ago
- 7 min read
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Principle Behind Step Four
Courage — The Willingness to Face Ourselves
Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
Courage — The Willingness to Face Ourselves
Step Four is where truth begins. It is a searching and fearless look at the causes and conditions of our lives—an honest examination of what has kept us blocked from God, others, and from ourselves.
This is not about feeling good. It is about gaining freedom. It is a fact-finding and fact-facing mission, a life-or-death survey. We dig into the wreckage not to shame ourselves but to see clearly what has been driving us. The goal is not to find blame but to find truth.
We uncover the ugly parts: the resentments, fears, guilt, and old ideas that have ruled us. We face the hypocrisy, the pride, and the selfish motives we have tried to hide. The courage in Step Four is not in writing it all down but in being willing to see it without turning away.
The Moral Inventory
The word “inventory” means to take stock, to identify what is good and what is bad, what stays and what goes. When a business takes inventory, it is not a moral judgment but a practical act of survival. If something is rotting on the shelf, it must be removed before it poisons the rest.
It is the same with us. Resentment is spiritual poison. Fear is paralysis of the soul. Left unchecked, they eat away at our sanity. This is the blockage that must be cleared. Just as physical constipation can kill the body, emotional and spiritual constipation can harm the mind and the spirit.
That is why it is strongly suggested that we write it down, line by line, name by name, fear by fear. Not to relive it, but to release it.
Resentment, Fear, and Sex: The Three Inventories
The Big Book gives us three inventories: resentment, fear, and sex. Each reveals the same truth, that my problems are of my own making.
Resentment Inventory: Whom do I hold anger toward, and why? What part of me was threatened, my self-esteem, security, relationships, or sex instincts? The answer always points back to self.
Fear Inventory: What am I afraid of, and why? Fear is at the root of nearly every defect. When my instincts feel threatened, I lash out or withdraw. Step Four helps me see where I have been driven by fear instead of faith.
Sex Inventory: How have I behaved in relationships? Where have I been selfish, dishonest, or inconsiderate? Where have I used others to try to fill the void within me? This helps me form a new ideal for relationships based on respect, honesty, and love.
Uncover, Discover, Discard
Uncover the truth about myself. Discover what lies beneath the surface, my motives, my patterns, my part. Discard what no longer serves me: fear, pride, self-pity, resentment, dishonesty. Step Four is not about condemnation but illumination. We bring everything into the light so it loses its power to control us.
When we stop blaming others, we begin to see the real source of our suffering: self-will run riot. The Big Book says, “Our troubles, we think, are basically of our own making.” (p. 62) This is not self-loathing. It is self-awareness. It is the beginning of freedom.
Courage in Action
Courage is not the absence of fear. It is action in spite of it. Step Four requires the courage to look directly at ourselves without defense, denial, or distraction. We face the truth of who we have been so that we can become who we were meant to be.
We learn that anger comes from fear, and fear comes from threatened instincts. When I feel threatened, my reaction is automatic: I strike, withdraw, or justify. Through inventory, I learn to pause, to ask God what the next right action is, and to respond rather than react.
That pause, that small moment of willingness, is where God begins to enter.
As we continue this work, humility begins to grow naturally, the honest awareness of who we are and who we are not. This is not humiliation but truth. In courage, humility is born.
Freedom Through Truth
Step Four is not about shame. It is about freedom. It removes the debris that blocks us from the sunlight of the spirit. We cannot grow if we are unwilling to see where we stand.
God is not found in perfection but in honesty. When I put my truth on paper, I clear the channel between myself and my Higher Power. The courage to see myself honestly becomes the doorway to peace.
This step marks the shift from living in reaction to living in awareness. Through courage and honesty, I begin to fit myself to be of maximum service to God and the people about me.
When I know myself, truly know myself, I can finally be free of myself.
The Principle of Courage
Courage is the strength to walk into the dark and trust that the light will follow. It is the willingness to look, to write, and to tell the truth. Step Four is not for the faint of heart, but neither is recovery. This is where transformation begins. When I have the courage to face myself, I am no longer afraid to live.
Written by Michael M. Windsor, Ontario, Canada
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Call for Stories: AA to Publish New Pamphlet for the Transgender Alcoholic
The General Service Office (GSO) of Alcoholics Anonymous, as recommended by an Advisory Action of the 2024 General Service Conference, has announced an important new literature project: the creation of a pamphlet titled “A.A. for the Transgender Alcoholic.”
To ensure this piece truly reflects the voices, experiences, and diversity of our Fellowship, GSO is inviting transgender, non-binary, genderqueer, Two-Spirit, and gender-nonconforming members to share their personal recovery stories.
This is an extraordinary opportunity for our community to help shape AA literature that will support countless newcomers for years to come. Stories may touch on any aspect of recovery—experience, strength, hope, meeting experiences, sponsorship, service, the Steps and Traditions, mental health, transitioning in sobriety, or what safety and belonging in AA have meant to you.
The deadline to submit is March 31, 2026. Submissions can be made online, by email, or by postal mail. All authors’ anonymity will be protected whether or not a story is selected.
🔗 Read the full letter and submission guidelines here: Or visit: https://www.aa.org/submit-story-aa-for-the-transgender-alcoholic-pamphlet
If you’re part of the transgender community and have a story to share, your voice matters — and it may be exactly what the next alcoholic needs to hear.
Twelve Tips for a Sober, Joyous Holiday Season
Publication Date: 1981-12-01
Magazine Issue: December 1981
Holiday parties without alcohol may still be a dreary prospect for new AAs. But many of us have enjoyed the happiest holidays of our lives sober. Here are some tips:
Line up extra AA activities--meetings, speaking, phone answering.
Entertain AA friends, especially newcomers.
Keep AA phone numbers with you at all times--and use them.
Find out about special holiday parties, meetings, or other events at groups in your area, and go. If you're shy, take a newer member.
Skip drinking occasions you're nervous about. Remember your drinking talent for making excuses? Put it to work for you in sobriety.
If you must attend a drinking party, and can't find a fellow AA to come with you, keep some candy handy.
You don't have to stay late. Plan for an "important date."
Go to church. Any church.
Don't sit around brooding. Catch up on reading, letters, walks.
Remember, one day at a time. Don't start now to worry about all those "holiday temptations."
If you can't give material gifts this year, you can give love.
"Having had a . . ." You already know the Twelfth Step!
Copyright © The AA Grapevine, Inc. (December 1981) Reprinted with permission. All rights reserved. To subscribe to AA Grapevine, please visit https://www.aagrapevine.org
Spotlight On Sobriety 11/30/2025
The Spotlight On Sobriety 11/30/2025 features personal stories, articles and reflections submitted by members and friends of the fellowship. The views expressed are those of the individual authors and do not necessarily represent those of Alcoholics Anonymous or GaL-AA.
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